Believe it or not, the internet is over twenty years old, but despite that being more than a hundred in Internet Years, online clothing retailers have some of the worst product photography known to man. Models either look awkwardly stiff and uncomfortable (see SSENSE and Tres Bien) or they’re inexplicably made anonymous with their heads cropped off (see Mr. Porter and Barney’s).
My favorite model is the one at Gentry, who has taken the craft of wearing clothes in front of a camera to a high-art. His poses are expressive, engaging, and mysterious – but in ways that go beyond the usual dead stares you see in fashion ads. No, he’s mysterious because you never really quite understand what’s going on. Is he gesturing at something, talking to the photographer, or doing the hokey pokey? Here are my favorites, along with some guesses on what he’s saying.
“Hold on Jerry, while I go get some pants.”
"Mama mia! J’how are you going to sell ready-made pents for $500?”
“HEY, enough with the ‘reads Four Pins once’ joke.”
“See, you can *literally* elevate a whole outfit by barely placing a cap on your head.”
"I call this my air-blogger pose.”
"OK, for my first Howcast video, I’ll show you how to Dougie.”
"You know I don’t need this modeling job right? My Howcast career is about to take off.”
Take note, fashion retailers: this is how your models should look. No more overly serious poses for the ridiculous act of trying to sell clothes. Menswear should be fun.